He was your mountain
by sweetness4theheart
Summary: Sas/sak. Sasuke thought he would feel happiness when he finally defeated his brother. Yet all he feels is sadness and Sakura tell him why. Killing Itachi was harder than anyone would have thought, emotionally and physically.


He was your mountain

"It was hard" he mused, staring up at the stars. He never looked at the girl beside him, or achknowledged that she was bloody and dirty. To do so would admit that he cared, and to admit that he cared was to admit that he was weak. This boy, no this man, for he had become a man along his journey, could not do that. Years of ingrained restraint and withheld emotions stopped him from showing her. Showing that he loved her. Besides, she was strong, she would be fine.

She had an air of cynical humour about her, as if what he has said was of some expected irony.

Her voice came soft "What else did you expect? We are what we are and we face mountains that we must overcome. He was your mountain. The mountain you had to use cunning and tactics, knowledge and blind faith, selfishness and selflessness, bravery and foolishness to plow through. He was the mountain that was your equal. Of course it was hard". Her words contrary to the gentleness in her voice meant to sooth. She spoke the truth and her words were fierce.

"He was everything to me. I guess I just didn't understand how much I ... how much he affected me" the boy admitted, not willing to say what the girl already knew.

He didn't expect it to hurt this much, to feel sadness and regret instead of happiness. He was an avenger, it wasn't meant to go this way.

"You loved him Sasuke. You still love him".

"No" came his cold reply, though his heart pounded and tears came to his eyes.

Go away, he told them, willing himself not to show emotion, not to show weakness. He had already pushed away tears once this night, he was disgusted that he needed to again.

The memory flashed before his eyes.

_'Itachi leaned forward as a young Sasuke closed his eyes, slightly scared of what might happen. Instead all he felt was a flick on his forehead. Scowling, he opened his eyes. Itachi's timbre voice saying "Foolish outoto".'_

She reached up and rested her trembling hand against his face, weak from chakra exhaustion. "Yes" she said firmly. "You spent your whole life trying to force yourself to hate him when all you felt was hurt and betrayal. For hating him was better than loving the man that killed your clan. Yet you still loved him Sasuke, nothing has changed that, nothing ever will".

Tears fell from his eyes, but he kept his gaze away from her, not pulling away from her hand but neither drawing closer.

She used the other hand to wrap around the back of his neck.

"Sakura" he begged, his voice like a tortured child. It was a saddening sight to watch this man, the man she loved break.

Pulling his head to her chest she whispered "Don't worry. I'm here Sasuke. I've always been here".

She was like Naruto to him, though he wouldn't say it, couldn't say, not now anyway, he loved them both. They fought for him, believed in him even though he betrayed them. He'd tried to kill them, if only to get rid of the feelings they invoked. But now it was over, he had avenged his clan. He could love again.

She was there, holding him, even after all he had done. After the great battle that had taken place only hours ago. Naruto lay sleeping on the other side of them, tired but content at knowing that his best friend was finally going to come home. Kakashi was still where they had left him; bruised and battered, looking down at his brothers' body.

Stuck in his brothers' sharingan, Sasuke knew he needed to get out of there. Again and again, Itachi played those memories over and over in his head. But he had lived through this pain a thousand times, he would not succumb. It was when the battle was over, his brother's dead boy over his lap when they came. Akatsuki. If his former team, plus his replacement (something that did not sit well with him) and the wood master, had not come, then he would have died. But they had come, they had saved him and when it was over, his two former team mates had let him say his goodbye's to the brother he had chased after for so many years. When he had turned away, tears filling his eyes, they had taken him to this very spot he sat now, waiting, as they always had.

His brother's final moments replayed in his head, his confusion overwhelming. The man that had died in his arms, was him, his brother, just like he was before the death of his clan, before revenge. He supposed he should have felt cheated. His brother had poked him in the forehead, just as he did when they were young and naïve', before dying with a smile on his face. But he did not feel cheated.

He felt . . . peaceful.

Confused, sad, sore, tired, many things, but underneath it all, in a spot where only revenge had lived these past few years, lay a sense of peace.

But for now, with Naruto beside him and Sakura holding him close, he would sleep.

As he let himself drift into the comfort of her embrace, warm like a mother's touch many years ago, he thought.

_' Why aniki? Why? I loved you.'_

_'Anything for you foolish outoto.'_


End file.
